Andiamo A Comandare Lyrics in English by Fabio Rovazzi

Below, I translated the lyrics of the song Andiamo A Comandare by Fabio Rovazzi from Italian to English.
Ma guardi signor Rovazzi
But look, Mr. Rovazzi
Ho in mano qua la sua cartella
I have your file here in my hand
E devo dirle che tra tutti i valori
And I have to tell you that of all values
Le è salito l'andare a comandare
She felt like going to command
Mi spiace
I'm sorry
Ho un problema nella testa, funziona a metà
I have a problem in my head, it works halfway
Ogni tanto parte un suono che fa
Every now and then a sound comes out
E ogni volta che mi parte, situa imbarazzante
And every time I leave, it's embarrassing
Come quella volta che stavo al ristorante
Like that time I was at the restaurant
'Posso offrirti da bere?', lei dice, 'Va bene'
'Can I buy you a drink?', she says, 'Okay'
Solo che quando le passo il bicchiere
Except when I hand her the glass
È una malattia, è pericolosa
It's a disease, it's dangerous
Statemi lontano, è contagiosa
Stay away from me, it's contagious
Non so se son pazzo o sono un genio
I don't know if I'm crazy or I'm a genius
Faccio i selfie mossi alla Gue Pequeno
I take blurry selfies like Gue Pequeno
Non mi fumo canne, sono anche astemio
I don't smoke joints, I'm also a teetotaler
Io non faccio brutto ma
I don't do ugly but
Col trattore in tangenziale
With the tractor on the ring road
Scatto foto col mio cane
I take photos with my dog
In ciabatte nel locale
In slippers in the room
Spaccio acqua minerale
I sell mineral water
Ho un problema nella testa, funziona a metà
I have a problem in my head, it works halfway
Ogni tanto parte un suono che fa
Every now and then a sound comes out
E ho la testa che gira come il kebab
And my head is spinning like kebab
Spengo la musica dentro il tuo club
I turn off the music inside your club
Non so se son pazzo o sono un genio
I don't know if I'm crazy or I'm a genius
Faccio i selfie mossi alla Gue Pequeno
I take blurry selfies like Gue Pequeno
Non mi fumo canne, sono anche astemio
I don't smoke joints, I'm also a teetotaler
Io non faccio brutto ma
I don't do ugly but
Col trattore in tangenziale
With the tractor on the ring road
Scatto foto col mio cane
I take photos with my dog
In ciabatte nel locale
In slippers in the room
Spaccio acqua minerale
I sell mineral water
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