Sh*t, there's a corpse in my basement
It wasn't me, but I can't prove it
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
There's a dead guy on my couch
It wasn't me and he isn't my grandpa either
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
I went to the hardware store 'cause I wanna ask
If they've got a big box, something like a coffin
Or if it's enough if I just chop her up
With the shredder in the yard or the chainsaw
And then I'll invite my buddies over for a barbecue
There's meat for everyone, come on, dig in
Or I'll build a conservatory and pour her into concrete
Or build a rocket and shoot her to the moon
I'll stick her in the deep-freeze
'cause nobody can see her there
And I'll take her out in winter
and build a snowman out of her
Sh*t, there's a corpse in my basement
It wasn't me, but I can't prove it
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
There's a dead guy on my couch
It wasn't me and he isn't my grandpa either
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
I wake up with a massive hangover, my whole bed is wet
I remember nothing, guess I skipped last night completely
I say, dear day, please don't get any worse
But on the way to the bathroom, there's a corpse right in the room
Is he okay, what's this a**hole thinking?
Lying around like I killed him, but I didn't
Man, does he really have to paint the floor red with his blood?
How the hell could he die? I gotta get rid of him
Alright, return to sender, your letter comes with a corpse
Or slice yourself a piece off him at my butcher shop
I'll drop her with the hobos under the bridge, they rarely care
Or I'll set her up with those Body Worlds statues
I don't think Copperfield can help and neither can Uri Geller
Nah, I'll just stash her with the others in my cellar
People come, corpses go, that's life
Then back to the bar, like nothing ever happened
Sh*t, there's a corpse in my basement
It wasn't me, but I can't prove it
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
There's a dead guy on my couch
It wasn't me and he isn't my grandpa either
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
I know I didn't do it, but nobody will believe me
I'll send her to Afghanistan, off to Iraq
Nobody notices there, masses die every day
I'll ship her to parliament with the delivery guy
Because every politician has bodies in their basement
I'll wait for the next shooting spree and stash her in the auditorium
Nobody will notice between Max and Laura
Then I googled it, organs earn good money
I'll sell the spare parts
turn every bit into a banknote
Sh*t, there's a corpse in my basement
It wasn't me, but I can't prove it
Sh*t! There's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
There's a dead guy on my couch
It wasn't me and he isn't my grandpa either
Sh*t! There's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
But the answer's way closer than you think
I'll just wait till my neighbor's asleep
Then I'll sneak quietly into his house
And simply put the corpse on his couch
Sh*t, there's a corpse in my basement
It wasn't me, but I can't prove it
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?
There's a dead guy on my couch
It wasn't me and he isn't my grandpa either
Sh*t, there's blood everywhere, but I didn't do it
How do I get rid of her, anybody got a plan?