I've often talked about it without talking about it, I just skimmed the subject
I was too ashamed to say how I built myself an isolated world
Isolated from everything, from family tables
From happy meet-ups I didn't wanna go through
I was scared to show others that I don't know how to feed myself
Better to let myself die
If I eat, if I eat, I'm going to hell
If I eat, if I eat, I'm going to hell
I've often talked about it without talking about it
I didn't wanna put words on it, no
Telling you it's an illness
Is telling you who I really am
I've gulped, blasted, devoured
Stuffed myself with that huge emptiness
And to say it's about food
I just wanna fill my belly
If I eat, if I eat, I'm going to hell
If I eat, if I eat, I'm going to hell
If I talk to you about it today
It's 'cause I've stepped back
'Cause I feel I've kinda come out of that strange bubble
I think I've understood the why and how
Even if it's never over, this time it's different
'Cause I've told you everything
If I eat, if I eat, it's not hell
If I eat, if I eat, maybe it's heaven even
If I eat, if I eat, it's not hell